After Hours Excitement

Posted on August 10, 2014 by The Sugarlump

I was up in the wee hours both Saturday and Sunday this past weekend. Not because I was out partying and living it up. Not by choice. In fact, I’m almost certain I was in bed by 11 PM both evenings. By choice. I had been up earlier that preferred several times last week and was looking forward to some much needed restorative sleep.

About 3 AM on Saturday, I was in a deep sleep, dreaming of wonderful things. Suddenly, I was accosted by a blaring alarm. At first I thought it was the house alarm, but then remembered I hadn’t set that. I then realized it was the smoke alarm about 10 feet from my head. I was familiar with these things chirping if the battery was dying or sounding if I had burnt something in the kitchen, but never had one caused temporary deafness for no apparent reason.

I tried the reset button and a new battery, but that only resulted in a few minutes of relief until I was again jarred out of my sleep and sure my heart rate would never return to normal. Thankfully my parents were in town so I went to get my dad to see if he could get the alarm to stop. I felt bad that I had to wake him up (somehow my parents had slept through the alarm blaring…) but he was able to take down the defective alarm so I could sleep in peace for the next few hours.

Last evening, I went to bed on the early side because I was tired from the previous night’s excitement. Around 4 AM, I wake up to some sort of ruckus coming from the other room. I turn on the lights and walk down the hall toward the noise. It seems to be coming from the family room. I come into the family room and find Miss Scarlett with her back to me in the far corner. Upon closer inspection, I see that she has a mouse cornered, on his back, with his arms up in the air as if surrendering and pleading for his life. No exaggeration.

He tries to get away a few times and she smacks him back into the corner with her big, furry paws. I moved to go get a box or some vehicle for escorting the mouse out of the house and must have distracted Scarlett in doing so. Little mousy made a run for it. Scarlett and mousy made dozens of laps around the coffee table until Scarlett was able to force him into another corner where I had several bags of fabric samples. Trying to escape the furry beast, the mouse backed up the side of one of the bags and fell in. Somehow Scarlett seemed to miss this development and proceeded to nearly hyperventilate as she furiously sniffed all of the other bags and the space between them. Meanwhile, I crossed the handles of mousy’s bag so he couldn’t jump out as I took the bag downstairs and out to the porch. I opened the bag and leaned it over. Mousy scurried out into the darkness. Back upstairs, Scarlett looked confused as to where the new toy had gone.

After reenacting the last thirty minute’s sequence of events to each my mom and dad, my head hit the pillow pretty hard. Scarlett slept off the excitement all day on the sofa.

Today, I bought some not so cheap restorative moisturizer that has extract of every plant known to man that will hopefully erase my newly acquired wrinkles, age spots and bags under my eyes.

Hopefully I will make it through the night undisturbed.

Y’all hurry back,

Sugarlump

Knock Knock…

Posted on January 14, 2014 by The Sugarlump

During the ice age we experienced recently, there was a woodpecker that kept trying to peck through the exterior wall of my office. I don’t really blame him except for the fact that he made it very hard for me and Gus and Scarlett to concentrate. Me on my work and Gus and Scarlett on their naps.

Barney Fife and Andy Griffith had narrowed in on this situation, springing into action from their deep slumber on the sofa in a matter of seconds.

Scarlett tried to stare a hole through the wall. Gus got distracted by a woman walking her dog.

Scarlett assumed the position as the suspect’s knocking intensified.

Scarlett decided she needed a better angle.

Although this looks like a tender moment, Gus was not pleased that Scarlett infringed on his personal space.

Gus shared his feelings and Scarlett quickly made him regret it.

“Are you calling me fat???!!”

Tensions subsided as the two were quickly reminded of the task at hand. Mr. Pecker had resumed his knocking.

All in a day’s work.

Y’all come back,

Sugarlump

A Tad Bit Chilly

Posted on January 6, 2014 by The Sugarlump

Oh hey….it’s like cold here. Like, REALLY cold. I thought I moved to the south for a more moderate climate? I think I accidentally brought the northeastern weather with me. Actually, you know what? My sister just returned to Nashville from Boston on Friday by some sort of miracle considering every other flight on the planet was canceled. I think I’ll blame her for bringing the snow and frigid temperatures. I feel warmer already.

It is so cold, in fact, that I had to use all of my Xena-warrior-princess strength to open Eugene’s car door last evening.

This is my bedroom window. Hooray for single pane glass! Not.

The driveway is covered in ice, which makes for especially exciting picture-taking/ice-skating in flat boots.

This almost looks fake to me, like when they frost the windows on movie sets in Hollywood. I wish I were in southern California at the moment.

Time to invest in some firewood.

Off to make gallons of hot chocolate,

Sugarlump

Ladies’ Lunch

Posted on January 5, 2014 by The Sugarlump

In recent years, my mom and some of her good childhood friends have gotten together for a ladies’ lunch with all daughters, mothers, aunts, and sisters invited, too. And absolutely no boys allowed. It would be rude to invite them anyway because we have to talk about them. Or at least the ladies want to hear from the daughters about any boyfriends on the scene.

Although we got together for lunch, Glenda, this year’s host, had prepared quite a delicious feast: baked ham, green beans and potatoes, candied fried apples, butternut squash, cranberry sauce and rolls. It was positively scrumptious and beautiful. Glenda had set the table with lovely pieces of china and vintage dishes.

Served alongside the food were lots of great stories about growing up together and how much the small town has changed. There was quite a discussion about how hitch-hiking was no big deal back in the day, the new art gallery in town, and big personalities that everybody knew and loved.

And, in true southern fashion, there were just as many desserts as there were dishes for the main meal. Among them were jam cake with both dough icing (my favorite) and caramel icing (my mom’s favorite), chocolate cake, bourbon balls, coconuts balls, peanut brittle, cookies and more.

I love my mom’s face in this picture. I think she was saying, “Don’t be eying that caramel iced jam cake, lady.” Just kidding. I think.

We shared lots of laughs over good memories. There were some really good ones, but if I told you about them I’d have to kill you. Or at least I might not be invited back to ladies lunch.

Y’all come back,

Sugarlump

Christmas 2013

Posted on December 30, 2013 by The Sugarlump

Christmas Eve morning, my immediate family had our Christmas here in Nashville. It was a lovely, cold, sunny day and I saw a few snow flurries float by as I made my way from my bedroom to the coffee. Now that Santa brings my sister’s and my gifts wrapped since there is no need for assembly, the morning commences with less urgency, though it is still a very special day. This year was particularly special because we only have 2 chairs in the living room so my sister and I sat on the floor. I don’t think we noticed. We were just happy to be together.

I have a little bit too much fun sometimes when it comes to gift giving and gift wrapping. I gave Eugene a pair of slippers with stuffed animal puppies on them for when her “dogs are barkin.'” I got a real chuckle out of that one. I think she did, too. She may think it was a gag gift, but I will insist she wear them at all times when she’s here.

We recently purchased a dehumidifier for the basement and I asked the installer to save the box for me. I had a particular gift I needed to wrap in the large box. My mom was eager to find out what required such a large box.

A pair of earmuffs! My dad thought it was pretty funny, too.

The best gift reaction, however, was my dad’s. We got tickets for the 4 of us to go to the Kentucky vs. Louisville game this past Saturday. For those of you who aren’t familiar with Kentucky basketball, this game is a very big deal. Perhaps the biggest of deals. And guess what? Kentucky won! Barry was one happy guy.

Clearly, it was a successful Christmas.

We headed up the road to Cumberland County, where my grandparents live. We started out at my dad’s parents’ house Christmas morning. It must have been too early and I must have been under-caffeinated as I failed to document that leg of the journey. My bad. It was lovely, I promise. I was wearing pajamas so it’s probably best there aren’t pictures.

Lastly, we made the several mile trek down the road to Grandmother’s house where our wardrobes expanded.

Here, we had cleaned up a bit and were camera ready. I love my dad’s face in this picture. I think this is the most he’s been photographed since my sister and I were born as he is usually the one taking the pictures.

For the first time ever, I was sitting in the other Wingback back like this one Grandfather is sitting in. In 25 years, I had never sat in one of these chairs as we exchanged gifts. I don’t know why, but it seemed like a big milestone for me. I had a whole new perspective from which to appreciate my Grandmother’s living room and our holiday tradition.

I love these sofas. They are so fabulous. I can’t say no to velvet…

…or animal print. Eugene and I had a good laugh when we each pulled out leopard dresses to wear Christmas Day. This was not planned. Happy accident?

Hope y’all had a Merry Christmas,

Sugarlump

J’adore Holiday Decor

Posted on December 29, 2013 by The Sugarlump

I was glad to have a house to decorate this year for Christmas. The only thing is that I forgot how much work is involved. Not that I’m complaining! There is nothing that warms my heart more than a house adorned with greenery, poinsettias, candles and shiny things. Top it off with a Frasier Fir or Holiday Bayberry candle, and I might just explode with joy!

I took advantage of having family in town the weekend after Thanksgiving to get the tree put up. We selected a mighty fine-looking (and smelling) Frasier Fir. Thank goodness my dear sister Eugene has herculean strength and could lift the tree to an upright position as my dad secured it in the stand.

The tree had a beautiful shape with impressive uniformity…

…except for this one little branch here in the back that stuck out like a tail. It cracked me up so I left it there. Who wants a tree without a little bit of character? If I had it my way (and by my way, I mean if I won the lottery and could justify spending 4 figures on live greenery), I would have one of those miniature, spindly, misshapen Charlie Brown trees in every room because I think they are hysterical and precious. Fortunately for anyone who comes to my house, my holiday decor fund has a limit.

AFTER my dad and I had strung the lights on the tree, I realized that my transition from the LED lights purchased last year for my tree that was half the size of this one to the new incandescent lights that I purchased this year to bridge the gap was not so smooth.

See the annoying blur of the white LED lights against the soft, warm glow of the smaller incandescent lights? I could not stand the sight of it so yours truly went out the next day to get some more of the 200 light strands of acceptable Christmas tree lights. When I got to Walgreens, where they were running a 2 for 1 special, I noticed that this location had 300 light strands for the same price as the 200 light strands. So instead of buying 2 more 200 lights strands, I bought 2 300 light strands, thinking I could get away with adding just 1 300 light strand to my existing 200 and then keep the “free” 300 light strand for another purpose. Perhaps for an unsuspecting shrub.

I got home and took the wretched LEDs off the top 2/3 of the tree and began stringing the regular, lovely, perfect, warm lights from the top. All was going swimmingly until I reached the point where I needed to connect the 300 light strand to the 200 light strand. I would like to tell you that these are the EXACT SAME LIGHTS FROM THE EXACT SAME MANUFACTURER. I held up the 3 prong connector of the 300 light strand ready to plug it into the receptacle of the 200 light strand only to discover that the 200 light strand’s receptacle had only 2 holes. JOY TO THE WORLD!

After contemplating poking my eyes out with the 3 prong connector so I couldn’t see the darn lights on the tree anyway, I collected myself and began taking the 200 light strand off the BOTTOM 1/3 of the tree so that I could make unexpected use of that additional “free” 300 light strand. I was concerned that my math wouldn’t work out and the lights would be too dense at the bottom of the tree, but the result was passable for my OCD self.

I was pleased with the end result, even though my camera doesn’t pick up the delicate glow of the lights very well in low-lighting.

As if that wasn’t enough light-enduced drama for one year, I decided to put electric candles in the windows. All 44 of them. I thought I might get crafty and use the battery operated LED lights (did I learn nothing from the tree episode?) to save (cause) myself some trouble. I put one in the window and didn’t really like the looks of it. It was too white and kind of dull. To see if I was imagining this, I put a plug-in incandescent candle next to it in the window and went out in the yard to compare the two from a distance. NO COMPARISON. I really wanted to like the LEDs for their energy savings and convenience; however, there might as well have been no candle in the window if I had opted for this route. It was pitiful, really, next to the arc of warm light radiating from the incandescent. More work for me, but I knew it would be worth it. 4 hours, 2 trips to the hardware store, and 16 extension cords later, it was totally worth it. I promise. It’s really a crime that I couldn’t get a good picture of it for you. I haven’t mastered night photography yet. Or day photography.

After all of that electrical excitement, I moved on to a few more basic decorating assignments: the front hall, the front door, the porch, the mantle, and the kitchen island.

The nice man at the farmers’ market gave us a good deal on this Frasier Fur wreath. I found some of that wide, mesh-like ribbon at Hobby Lobby and finished it off with a big ol’ bow.

I also stumbled upon some large faux wreaths at 50% off so I got 2 of those for the large windows on the porch. They got bows, too. Please disregard the expired mums that I had yet to remove as of the date this photo was taken. Please do note the snow on the roof! Too bad this wasn’t Christmas Day.

My dad had to trim a low-hanging branch off the tree to fit it into the tree stand, so I used that to fill out the mantle. My gold pears from Pier 1 a few years back gave the mantle a nice, rhythmic touch. First, I prepped the mantle with some saran wrap to keep the sap from creating a hot mess on the woodwork.

The final step was the stockings, which took a little bit of time and imagination. You see, I had found the most perfect faux fur tree skirt and pair of stockings at Homegoods. The only problem is that there are 4 people in my family, not 2. I called all of the surrounding TJ Maxx/Homegoods locations and non of them had more of these treasures. I had to get creative and settle on an eclectic look with the addition of another type of fur stocking and a fabulous sequined one, which I made my dad’s. He was confused and probably a little disturbed by this. It made me laugh.

On the topic of confused and disturbed, for my holiday arrangements in the kitchen and foyer, I spray-painted some branches gold. But not just any branches. Branches that came from 12 foot tree limbs that fell during an intense wind storm we had here in Nashville on Halloween. I drug these branches out of the yard and into my garage. I’m sure my neighbors thought I was crazy. You’d be amazed by what a little metallic gold spray paint and a small hand saw can do.

When it comes to holiday decorations, I think simple and natural is best…

…until I have to take it all down.

Covered in pine needles,

Sugarlump

Thanksgiving Trials and Tribulations: The Meal

Posted on December 24, 2013 by The Sugarlump

On Thanksgiving morning, I got up at 6 AM to get my 20lb turkey, Tyrone, into the oven. He had been brining in the garage for the previous 24 hours to ensure his flavorful tenderness. After several careful calculations, I heaved him up and out of his brining container and into the sink.

There is just nothing appetizing about a raw turkey. Especially a raw turkey taking a bath in your kitchen sink. FYI that’s a lemon from the brine, not a rubber ducky.

06:30: Judging by the mess, there was some serious cooking underway at this point.

Here I am mentally preparing myself to lift Tyron and escort him to the tanning bed.

A few last words. Bye bye, birdy.

Next on the list was to make the desserts and eat my breakfast since it was likely only about 7:00 AM at this point. Please note my “Oops! All Berries!”, the traditional thanksgiving breakfast cereal. As I noshed on my nutritious meal, I made brandy apple cake and derby pie. Technically, it was bourbon apple cake because I didn’t have any brandy and bourbon seems to make most things taste better. This wasn’t the last of the bourbon for the day, either.

My mom had gotten me this beautiful cake pan that was featured on the cover of Southern Living a year or so ago. I was anxious to see how cleanly the cake would come out of the pan and nervous that it might tear.

But it slid right out and looked lovely!

The pie looked good, but I overcooked it. While the taste was alright, the pie was so sticky that it stuck to my teeth like tar. This is why I make multiple desserts…with bourbon.

09:00: Princess Eugene arose around this time.

Meanwhile, I continued to baste Tyrone every 30 minutes or so. The previous owner of the home designed a lovely chef’s kitchen but only put in one oven. Have you ever cooked Thanksgiving dinner in one oven and in one day? Trying to juggle a 20lb turkey, a cake, a pie, dressing, sweet potatoes, roasted nuts, and popovers meant that Tyrone’s legs were a little underdone.

I promptly started measuring for an additional oven.

Looking golden, Tyrone!

About this time, I was roasting some pecans for the salad. Eugene walked in and asked if I was making popcorn. I gave her a very confused look and then ran to the oven to pull out my nuts that were so far past roasted that they were as black as night and beginning to melt into the pan. I took the pan outside and left it on the patio to get rid of the lovely smell. When I went to get the pan the next day, the nuts had been left untouched. They were even too far gone for the squirrels.

Ahhhhhhhhhhh!

At this point we had used every piece of cutlery in the kitchen. That is not an exaggeration. Things got especially tight when it was time for dessert.

My collection of serving utensils is lacking. And by lacking I mean nearly nonexistent.

As my mom finished up the gravy, she asked what I would like to put it in. In my imaginary gravy boat, of course! I scrambled for something suitable and came up with this silver nut bowl that was Aunt Anna’s. I think the soup ladle 4 times its size really completed the look.

Though we had a few challenges along the way, we managed to produce a nice meal. It was tasty, but not as spectacular as we had wanted so we started to make a plan for next year. Here’s a sneak peak at the menu: (If you’d like to come, please bring your own tailgating equipment.)

Fried corn! How did we forget this!!??? This is a thanksgiving staple
Roasted asparagus
Dressing patties
Root vegetable gratin
Bourbon bread pudding
Maybe just a turkey leg?

We’ll try to have the additional oven installed by then. Maybe we’ll have a proper table and chairs, maybe not.

Merry Christmas Eve!

Y’all keep it tasty,

Sugarlump

Thanksgiving Trials and Tribulations: The Table

Posted on December 15, 2013 by The Sugarlump

So I decided to have Thanksgiving in the new house, but the funny thing is that I have absolutely no dining room furniture. Not a stitch.

I did have these pine cones adorning the mantle across the room. I found them at a yard sale a few months back. Too bad you can’t sit on or eat off of them.

With less than a week before Thanksgiving, I had to put on my thinking cap.

My solution was not unlike glamping.

Actually glamping might be more glamorous.

Thank you to Costco and Ikea, I am the proud owner of a “dining set” for under $100. Coincidentally, I am now equipped for tailgating. I’m loving this versatile furniture.

Because I planned to serve slightly more elegant food than hotdogs and chips, I figured I might want to dress (hide) the table.

I found just the thing at Wal-mart: tone-on-tone ticking stripe fabric by the yard that I would transform into a tablecloth. Minor detail: Did I mention that I don’t sew?

Ta-da! With some creative cutting and folding, I successfully hid the evidence that my table was anything but solid mahogany.

I advised my guests not to lean too hard on my “delicate” table and explained that I was going for a more eclectic look with my “retro” chairs.

A little metallic never hurt anyone, so I started the tabletop with gold chargers and an actual vintage piece, a candelabra that my grandmother had given my great Aunt Anna before she passed. It was nice to have a reminder of her at the table. She was a great cook and an elegant lady. I think she would have been proud of my efforts.

Glassware and plates instantly made the table look fuller and shinier.

The table was beginning to look legitimate.

Then came some tinted glass bowls to add color and continue with the vintage theme. My mom and I made a last minute dash to Pier 1 for some golden yellow cloth napkins. I put together two low floral arrangements with my flowers from Costco. I love a show-stopping floral centerpiece, but I actually wanted to be able to see the other people at the table so I divided and conquered. I also added some burlap ribbon to my fancy chairs to complete my unique look.

I was pretty pleased with myself, especially since this set-up cost me less than the groceries for the meal.

Consider this my submission for the design on a dime challenge.

This is my favorite angle.

Eugene took this fab picture with her phone. I think it’s worthy of Martha Stewart Living.

This certainly wasn’t a traditional Thanksgiving set-up, but we all got to sit together around the table and have a good laugh. I’ll give thanks for that.

Stay tuned for the meal. It was not without its challenges.

Y’all keep it classy,

Sugarlump

Faux Fur Fabulousness

Posted on November 22, 2013 by The Sugarlump

Anyone who knows me or who has seen me dressed for the chillier months, knows that I LOVE faux fur. I have several faux fur vests and coats. I plan on upholstering a small stool in my sister’s bedroom with some faux fur because she is in desperate need of a foo foo bench. Who isn’t, really?

I recently purchased a faux fur pillow to be featured on the formal living room sofa. Our bond is so deep that I named her Priscilla the Pet Pillow.

I’m also a fan of alliteration.

Maybe I’ll write a book about her one day like those dogs that live at hotels. Priscilla the Pet Pillow Goes to Paris.

I like it. File that one for retirement.

While there are only so many appropriate applications for faux fur as it doesn’t lend itself to bathing suits, table cloths, or car exteriors, I was ecstatic/overjoyed/borderline mental when I came across Restoration Hardware’s new line of faux fur accents in their catalog. More specifically, their faux fur wine holders.

http://www.restorationhardware.com/catalog/product/product.jsp?productId=prod2320311&categoryId=search

How fabulous are these?!?! AND they are 25% off at just $9!! They come in 6 different kinds of faux fur! I wanted them badly. I called up the local restoration hardware and the conversation went something like this:

RH lady: “Restoration Hardware. How can I help you?”

Me: “DO YOU HAVE THE FAUX FUR WINE HOLDERS SHOWN IN YOUR CATALOG AT YOUR STORE??!!?”

RH lady: “Yes, we do.”

Me: “ARE THEY 25% OFF LIKE THEY ARE SHOWN IN THE CATALOG AND ONLINE?!?!?!?!”

RH lady: “Yes, they are.”

Me: “DO YOU HAVE GOOD STOCK?!??!”

RH lady: “We do.”

Me: “I’LL BE RIGHT OVER!!!”

I literally jumped in the car and drove to the mall. In less than 30 minutes, I was walking out of Restoration Hardware with my bag fabulous faux fur wine holders in tow.

Victory!

Y’all try to stay calm,

Sugarlump

P.S. There is a faux fur laptop case. I need it. In Mink. Does Santa read blogs?

Gold Mine

Posted on November 6, 2013 by The Sugarlump

I recently made a trip up to Boston to help my parents clean out closets and storage spaces that contain the relics of my childhood. In an effort to purge the no longer needed, my parents nominated me to make the call on what was too precious and dear to part with and what needed to find a new home in a hurry.

The major area that needed addressing was my sister’s and my old playroom that had become a resting place for furniture no longer allowed in the main part of the house.

Things only got worse before they got better.

But, boy, did they get good.

I found some real treasures among 3 carloads, 2 truckloads, and dozens of 55 gallon trash bags by the curb of rejected items.

This here is one of the Hanson brothers, also known as my little sister Eugene.

I found an entire box of cards that my sister’s classmates had made her when she had her tonsils removed in the first or second grade. By the volume of cards and the concern in her classmates’ scribbles, you would have thought she was having high-risk, open-heart surgery. She had many a reminder to eat popsicles, which had some very creative spellings. My favorite though, was this card from a young man who I deduce was named Harrison. He seemed to have some top secret information for Eugene on the inside of the card as she was to “plees opon alone.”

I found my Chapel signs from my senior year of high school. Man were those a trip.

This is me in 8^th grade with my kindergarten buddy. I think she’s applying to colleges now. I feel old.

Hard to believe since it was just yesterday that I was sporting pig tails and cat appliques.

Who remembers Lisa Frank?! I used to love to buy this stuff at the school store in elementary school!

I was unsure about this creature that belonged to Eugene. I sent her this picture to inquire about its nature.

Me: “What is this here creature?”

Eugene: “A horse in a kimono, naturally.”

Right. He was for sure a keeper.

Cards congratulating my parents on my birth. I’m not sure if it was a common thing to say back then (let’s hope), but a lot of the cards said, “take good care of her,” as if my parents were questionable guardians. This kind of made me laugh/worry.

This is a realtor packet from 1992 when my parents sold their first home in Maryland, where Eugene and I were born.

Apparently I took interest in homes and real estate at a young age as it appears I added my own notes to the list of house features.

I had a lot to add.

And that was only day one.

Y’all be good,

Sugarlump