Nosy Cat

If you look up nosy in the dictionary, this is what you will find:

No matter how hard I try to discipline my misguided cat Scarlett, her nosiness seems to get the best of her, especially when it comes to people food and the kitchen.

Several times a day, as I am sitting in the family room or my office, I hear the very distinct thump of 4 furry paws landing on the kitchen floor after leaping from the counter.

I then walk into the kitchen and find Scarlett either hurriedly trotting into the dining room or standing nonchalantly in the middle of the kitchen, staring into space.

Sometimes there is evidence that she has been on the counter, such as a stray paper towel or green bean on the floor.  One time, I found the remnants of a rib-eye steak on the floor half-way across the kitchen and Scarlett was nowhere to be found (behind a chair), licking her chops.

But most of the time I just hear the thump and by the time I walk into the room she has already destroyed (consumed) the evidence.

This is how our talks about her behavior normally go:

Me: “Scarlett, what were you just doing?”

Scarlett: ……………(stares intently at nothing)

Me: “Scarlett, you’re acting guilty.  Anything you want to confess?”

Scarlett: …………..(stares at Gus in an effort to divert my attention while praying that I have a bout of amnesia)

Me: “Scarlett!”

Scarlett: “Who?…….Me???” (tries her best to look innocent, shocked and pathetic)

Me: “Scarlett, I know you were on the counter.”

Scarlett: “I want a lawyer.”

Y’all come back now, ya hear?

Sugarlump

Scarlett

This is my cat Scarlett.

She’s a piece of work.

She is a tad smarter than my cat Gus and knows when she is being bad but goes on doing whatever she pleases anyway. What a punk.

She is nosy on a clinical level, which leads me to believe she is half raccoon.  She would prefer to spend her days making bird noises (strange, given she’s a CAT), rummaging through small waste baskets (thus leaving a crime scene on the floor) and dragging food scraps out of a sink of dirty dishes.  So far, my attempts to discipline her have been unsuccessful.  If her behavior gets any worse, I am threatening to send her to a feline correctional facility.  Here’s how she feels about that (note: photo taken after an altercation with the vacuum hose, her nemesis):

Here’s a mug shot from her previous offenses:

When I catch her in the act, she runs and hides, though she could use a lesson on being stealthy.

She also insists on sitting on/getting in any item you place on the floor (even if it’s a scrap of paper and especially if it is a box/bag/large purse).

Even though she’s a little rascal, I keep her around because she provides excellent tech support.

And, sometimes she just kills me with that little puddin’ face.

She wouldn’t want me to give you the impression that she’s really a big softie at heart so here is a much more regal shot from her linkedin profile:

She’s a mess but I love her.

Y’all come back now, ya hear?

Sugarlump

P.S.  Most of these photos were taken before I got my new camera so I apologize if they look as if they were taken underwater.  I assure you that they were not because Scarlett HATES baths/anything to do with a large quantity of water.